“It will never happen again…”
How many of us as abuse survivors have heard those words? In my experience, it seems to be a pretty high percentage.
After all of the torment, the name-calling and crazy-making conversations, maybe you’ve finally decided that you just can’t live that way anymore. So, you pack your bags and walk out, swearing that you will never see that heartless man** again.
A few days or weeks pass, and you find the courage to convey to your estranged spouse that it’s over. You’re not playing the crazy game for one more day. But suddenly you receive a message on your phone or a big bouquet of flowers arrives with a fancy card tucked inside. Your abuser passionately conveys a message that goes something like this:
“I realize what a fool I’ve been and how much I love you and need you in my life, and I want nothing more than for you to be happy. I know I’ve made my share of mistakes, and I want you to know that I will do whatever it takes to re-earn your love and trust. I feel terrible knowing that I have hurt you deeply, but I promise you it will never happen again. I will never love anyone as much as I love you, and I can’t imagine sharing my life with anyone else. So just know that I will never give up on us, and I hope you will give me another chance to show you how wonderful our life together can be.”