Sometimes it feels as though I have lived two profoundly different lifetimes.
Many years ago, I lived as one unloved, unseen and unappreciated, fearful and confused, trying to please someone who would not be pleased. Loneliness hung heavy over me. The wounds were deep, and the pain was crippling.
But, the day came when God set me free, and He began to whisper to me, reminding me of who I am – and whose I am. The truth is that He had been trying to speak to me for a long time, but I wasn’t listening. My pride was in the way.
I finally left that ungodly life behind. It was not an easy journey to find freedom and peace, but it was well worth the effort. And in time a new life with a new love began. Rather than feeling inadequate or fearful, I am adored and appreciated. I am not viewed as a pest, but as a priority. My husband is my protector, my provider, and my best friend.
I remember well that old, dark life, but now it feels like another lifetime.
It was.
If you sense God calling you out of the darkness and into His marvelous light, listen. It may be that He has a whole new life out there waiting for you, too.
“…hope in the Lord; for with the Lord there is lovingkindness, and with Him is abundant redemption.” Psalm 130:7
Amen! I feel the same after living in an abusive marriage for 20 years until God set me free 11 years ago.
I live such a different life now with a loving, caring man who I have proudly called my husband for the past 8 years.
Amazing, isn’t it, how God leads us from darkness to light, from grief to grace, from doubt to confidence – and on it goes! He is so good!
Thank you, as always, for sharing, Amy. I’m always happy to hear from you.
Cindy
I love how bold you were to walk away from your toxic marriage.
My husband married me to make use of me and I am totally fed up and wish I could leave.
In my community there is no walking away from marriage and even adultery can seem to be a petty reason for divorce. I do not want to lose family support by leaving my husband. I want God to open a way for me to escape. There was a time when my husband wanted to leave but he changed his mind. I am too weak to leave but if I prayed hard do you think God will cause him to leave instead? I am distraught thinking that I will have to stay with him for the rest of my life
Hello, Lucie. I’m glad you took the time to write me, and I’m sorry to read about you are going through. Perhaps you can enlighten me as to why your community would not support you should you decide to divorce. And, sad to say, most abusers don’t choose to leave because they appreciate the power they wield in the relationship. Go to the “About Me” tab on my website and pop down to “Contact Cindy” where you can find my email address. For ID protection purposes, my website won’t allow me to post it here. Also, I’ll be out of town for a few days, so if you don’t hear from me right away, I’ll get back to you when I return.
I look forward to hearing from you. Hang in there.
Cindy